[mr.burton]

This is kind of personal, but i'm gonna ask you anyway.

About 6 years back, my mother and uncle died, they grew me and my brother up. My father left when we were young. Growing up i was never really close to my cousins, aunts, and other family members. I was just really close to my brother, mother, and my uncle frank. Recently (since 2 years back) my older brother always tries to keep in contact with the rest of the family that we really never grew up with. We are close, but what annoys me is that he is always kinda begging me to show up at family functions/holidays etc. I feel bad making excuses all the time and not showing up when my brother asks me to. He is awesome and accepts my wishes to be alone.

This morning he left me a voicemail saying he would really like me to be there on christmas etc etc and everyone misses me. Now i don't want to sound cold, but i really don't want to be there, honestly. We hang out a couple times a month and it's awesome, but besides my big brother, i'm not really close to the rest of the family.

Anyone else been through this? I always feel like an outsider, and a loner. I'd rather the company of strangers then most of my family members (except my bro).

[BWAL]

i'm the same way

[roosgt!]

Your not alone on that, my family isn't close at all besides my borther mom and dad and my grandma before she passed away.
My dad was adopted so i don't know my grandparents very well since they have had nothing to do with my life or me growing up.
My aunts and uncles are not apart of my life and same with my cousins I think I talk to them once a year if that.
And now this year my so called grandparents invited me down for a Christmas dinner but I'm not sure if im gonna go because it will be so damn awkward that i will feel very uncomfortable being around all them.

[mr.burton]

Originally Posted by BWAL i'm the same way

Makes me feel better. Don't get me wrong, in the past i was there, for my brother....but i had to have a couple drinks just to have fun lol...i didn't really want to be there.

[98FireyGT!]

I'm the same way with my family....my moms side of the family is old money and all on the East coast. I havn't seen any of them since my mom remarried. Where as my stepdads family is all redneck country bumpkins and have pretty much never left Spokane.

I love them all, but I do not identify with my stepdads side of the family at all. It's always awkward as hell when I go to family get togethers.

[Six Banger]

If you're that close to your brother I'd still go for him. It may feel awkward, but is there something more pressing to do on xmas?

[B's04gt]

My mom was adopted as a child, as well as her "sister" I guess you could call her.

Well, after my grandpa died my mom's "sister" was a complete bitch and just didnt even really care to acknowledge her "dads" passing but more seemed to be in for the possesions.. They always beg me to come and see them for everything, ask me how I am, etc. But frankly after seeing how they treated my mom and acted after my grandfathers passing I could never even look at them. My mom is a single mother raising two children not making much of an income, we had food on the table and clothes on our back but never were doing finacially well. My mother having a good heart heard that her "sister" was kicking out her 24 year old son and basically leaving him to fend for himself. My mom took him in, Keep in mind the finacial sistuation, and she did everything in her power to take care of him. Well after 2 years of that and him beginning to start back talking, etc. she kicked him out and again was treated like shit... Basically, I have no desire to ever see them because of that.

So no, I dont disagree with your choice.

[mr.burton]

Originally Posted by Six Banger If you're that close to your brother I'd still go for him. It may feel awkward, but is there something more pressing to do on xmas?

Yeah man i might just do that. I love my brother, i'll go with him to endure the awkwardness lol.

[Six Banger]

Originally Posted by mr.burton Yeah man i might just do that. I love my brother, i'll go with him to endure the awkwardness lol.

I few rounds with Jack Daniels always helps out too when youre there

[101fng]

i'm sort of the same way. my mom's side of the family is... um... "cultured" i guess. at least that's the best way to describe them. her family has been apart of this town since damn near the beginning and everybody in this town knows at least one of her family members. i'm not saying they're uppity or anything, but dirty jokes are a no-go and alcohol is only ok if it comes from a wine bottle. they're all very nice people and are not snobs in any way, but i just don't identify with them (other than my grandfather; deceased).

my father's side on the other hand, they are definitely my type. i just don't get to see them enough. that side of the family has recently gone through some serious shit (my grandmother and her youngest son, my uncle, died within hours of each other in separate incidents) so being around them now is different. it's been about a year since that day, but they're all still grieving i guess.

so to sum it up, i don't see my extended family very much anymore. i see my immediate family a little bit more, but for the most part, i only see my dad regularly. being around my mom is awkward since she picked up a new boyfriend (she WILL NOT stop talking about him). my little brother lives on the other side of the country. and my two older half brothers are both preoccupied with their families and school, job, or lack thereof.

[mr.burton]

Originally Posted by Six Banger I few rounds with Jack Daniels always helps out too when youre there

Sooooo true lol.

[whyxitx]

Idk, i love my family.. both sides of it. They're all wacky as hell and are cool with just about anything. all the guys on my mom's side are into cars (grandpa taught shop at the highschool in town) and all the girls are just crazy women. I don't know much about my dad's side since they're scattered throughout the US, but they come in and visit every couple of years.

[roosgt!]

I don't have much family in north America lol a couple in Wisconsin a cousin in California and the rest in Russia and sweden.

[whyxitx]

you forgot me..

[zinsavage123]

i swear im the same way man no bs kinda the lone wolf of my family too!

[roosgt!]

Originally Posted by whyxitx you forgot me..

How could I forget my bf from Nebraska

[whyxitx]

That's more like it.

[RedDevilGT]

I'm the same way man, I haven't seen my family since February 2006. I've always been the lone wolf growing up, and it seemed to carry over into my adulthood. I guess it didn't help thing that my parents said I'd never make it through basic training
7 Years later here I am as a SSgt, sometimes you just have to look out for yourself when things seem like their not going to change.

[Dolbs4082]

My dad has 2 brothers and 3 sisters, all of which have children. we live in a town of 2500 people and litterally half the town is related to me. I dont have any contact with my cousins. My aunts and uncles all screwed my dad over and so we dont talk to them. Dad takes care of his mom, and thats it.

Then on my moms side, she has one sister. Who was the Attorney General of Kansas for quite a while. Growing up she was the BEST aunt you could ask for. Always stopping by, always spending time with us. She was divorced and had no kids of her own. So when she'd go on her trips all over the country, i got to go with her. Memories made on those trips were AMAZING!

Then fast forward to about 10 years ago. She got married to a big shot news anchor, and we lost contact. She is always in florida or oklahoma for the holidays with his family. And rarely comes to see our family any more. She is now trying to get back in with us. Which is great.

[brokenweasel]

Originally Posted by Six Banger If you're that close to your brother I'd still go for him. It may feel awkward, but is there something more pressing to do on xmas?

Originally Posted by mr.burton Yeah man i might just do that. I love my brother, i'll go with him to endure the awkwardness lol.

Awesome brothers FTW! If you're brother is cool you can have fun just about anywhere I've found.