The Buffalo Theory

HMUSN · March 9th, 2008, 01:40 PM

This is something I've always suspected was true, but now that I've seen it in print, it HAS TO BE TRUE, Right?

In one episode of 'Cheers', Cliff is seated at the bar describing the "Buffalo Theory" to his buddy, Norm. I don't think I've ever heard the concept explained any better than this .

'Well you see, Norm, it's like this . . . A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the lowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.

In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Now, as we know, excessive intake of alcohol kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine.

And that, Norm, is why you always feel smarter after a few beers.

thetrooper31 · March 9th, 2008, 01:41 PM

Rico-mofos · March 9th, 2008, 01:44 PM

Cliff was like the yoda of cheers!

LanceD · March 9th, 2008, 01:55 PM

I guess this means my morning alcoholism is ok!

By the way Doc, do you have any idea how hard it is to read a long post when your avie is staring at me? hehe

HMUSN · March 9th, 2008, 02:04 PM

mustangjeff1997 · March 9th, 2008, 02:19 PM

haha, nice..."Mom! Can I go get some beers? It will make me smarter! Just come read this and it makes it all clear!" lol

Tony_90fox · March 9th, 2008, 02:19 PM

some of my friends are actually smarter when they are drunk...it's crazy

**Chris** · March 9th, 2008, 02:29 PM

Vinyl66 · March 9th, 2008, 02:39 PM

i concur

WAR-PARTY · March 9th, 2008, 03:03 PM

I should be part of a Mensa group, IAW his outlook on life; Cliff FTW

Cricket · March 9th, 2008, 03:14 PM

Originally Posted by LanceD

I guess this means my morning alcoholism is ok!

By the way Doc, do you have any idea how hard it is to read a long post when your avie is staring at me? hehe

Sure as hell is...

I hate his avie it pisses me off.

HMUSN · March 9th, 2008, 03:16 PM

Cricket · March 9th, 2008, 03:22 PM

GOD...That shit pisses me off. Every single time I see a fuckin clown, I get extremely angry. I feel like murdering every single one of them pieces of shit. I HATE CLOWNS!! They seriously need to wiped out. and mimes.

HMUSN · March 9th, 2008, 03:24 PM

Cricket · March 9th, 2008, 03:25 PM

I don't understand it. I just get huge bursts of anger when I see a clown or a mime. I don't know what it is. I really feel like murdering them also. Like there not people. I don't get it at all. They don't freak me out or scare me or anything, they just make me unusually angry.

HMUSN · March 9th, 2008, 03:29 PM

So I guess we finally found out who done it huh?

Google Image Result for http://jtmichaelson.files.wordpress.com/2007/02/dead_clown.jpg

WAR-PARTY · March 9th, 2008, 03:45 PM

Originally Posted by Cricket

I don't understand it. I just get huge bursts of anger when I see a clown or a mime. I don't know what it is. I really feel like murdering them also. Like there not people. I don't get it at all. They don't freak me out or scare me or anything, they just make me unusually angry.

Dude you need to catch Pen and Teller on ST they have a show devoted to Anger management, funny as hell!

LanceD · March 9th, 2008, 03:46 PM

Originally Posted by Cricket

I don't understand it. I just get huge bursts of anger when I see a clown or a mime. I don't know what it is. I really feel like murdering them also. Like there not people. I don't get it at all. They don't freak me out or scare me or anything, they just make me unusually angry.

I can think of a certain Eurotrip scene that is right up your alley...

Cricket · March 9th, 2008, 05:25 PM

Originally Posted by WAR-PARTY

Dude you need to catch Pen and Teller on ST they have a show devoted to Anger management, funny as hell!

anger management pisses me off

March 9th, 2008, 01:40 PM	#1
HMUSN Doc 1986 SVO Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 36,836 iTrader: 9 reviews	The Buffalo Theory This is something I've always suspected was true, but now that I've seen it in print, it HAS TO BE TRUE, Right? In one episode of 'Cheers', Cliff is seated at the bar describing the "Buffalo Theory" to his buddy, Norm. I don't think I've ever heard the concept explained any better than this . 'Well you see, Norm, it's like this . . . A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the lowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Now, as we know, excessive intake of alcohol kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. And that, Norm, is why you always feel smarter after a few beers. __________________

March 9th, 2008, 01:41 PM	#2
thetrooper31 Banned Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Horsham , Pennsylvania Posts: 1,250 iTrader: 1 reviews	__________________ [SIZE=5][COLOR=Yellow][/COLOR][/SIZE][COLOR=green] [/COLOR]

March 9th, 2008, 01:44 PM	#3
Rico-mofos Hardcore Enthusiast 2008 Bullitt #890 slow Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Chicago Posts: 1,594 iTrader: 0 reviews	Cliff was like the yoda of cheers! __________________ BULLITT CREW #5 LT GTB mufflers for sale

March 9th, 2008, 01:55 PM	#4
LanceD Regular 2001 Mustang V6 Slow Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Mesa, AZ Posts: 156 iTrader: 0 reviews	I guess this means my morning alcoholism is ok! By the way Doc, do you have any idea how hard it is to read a long post when your avie is staring at me? hehe __________________ Just another middle class white guy.

March 9th, 2008, 02:04 PM	#5
HMUSN Doc 1986 SVO Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 36,836 iTrader: 9 reviews	__________________

March 9th, 2008, 02:19 PM	#7
Tony_90fox Banned Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Bowling Green, KY Posts: 3,831 iTrader: 0 reviews	some of my friends are actually smarter when they are drunk...it's crazy

March 9th, 2008, 02:29 PM	#8
Chris Regular 1989 LX Coupe Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: St. Pete, Fl Posts: 377 iTrader: 0 reviews	__________________ 7.87 @ 93 mph http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZwEEQUYY8gA

March 9th, 2008, 02:39 PM	#9
Vinyl66 Anatidaephobic 1966 Vinyl Mustang 2012 Hyundai Elantra GLS Join Date: Sep 2007 Posts: 2,353 iTrader: 0 reviews	i concur __________________ Pittsburgh Steelers/Penguins/Pirates FTMFW!!!!!

March 9th, 2008, 03:03 PM	#10
WAR-PARTY Hardcore Enthusiast 2001 YUGO GT Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: GOAT LOCKER PENSACOLA FL Posts: 1,701 Blog Entries: 1 iTrader: 0 reviews	I should be part of a Mensa group, IAW his outlook on life; Cliff FTW __________________ How I met my wife! Our first date...

March 9th, 2008, 03:16 PM	#12
HMUSN Doc 1986 SVO Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 36,836 iTrader: 9 reviews	__________________

March 9th, 2008, 03:24 PM	#14
HMUSN Doc 1986 SVO Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 36,836 iTrader: 9 reviews	__________________

March 9th, 2008, 03:29 PM	#16
HMUSN Doc 1986 SVO Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 36,836 iTrader: 9 reviews	So I guess we finally found out who done it huh? Google Image Result for http://jtmichaelson.files.wordpress.com/2007/02/dead_clown.jpg __________________

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