[RavensChild]

I want to know what the best lies are that you have told to customers are your job to get them to go away?

mine is, i work at a pool and down at the lazy river (which is separate from the regular pool) and a few little kids come down and i dont feel like getting out of the water to watch them i tell them that the FLUX CAPACITOR is broken. lol. They ask how long and i tell them i dont know. They then ask why are you in there, my response "cause i can" then they leave. WOOT WOOT FREE TIME

[JASonic]

Good ole Flux Capacitor breakin down! LOL!


Well, Ive never lied to make the go away, but Ive lied to make them buy from me in the past. I'd say "If you buy my equipment, it will work". JK.

I have lied and told certain customers my computer was down to avoid doing bullshit work for them. But nothing fun!

[BWAL]

when i worked at arby's, people always wanted spicy three pepper sauce whenever i was working at the drive thru, and we dont have a spicy three pepper sauce dispenser back there.. we had to run to the back, grab a cup and lid, run to the lobby, fill it up with the outsde dispenser, then bring it back to the customer atthe window.. i always told them we were out.. some people actually said "are you sure? go look again for me" hen i'd just close the window and start talking to other people

[RavensChild]

Originally Posted by BWAL09 when i worked at arby's, people always wanted spicy three pepper sauce whenever i was working at the drive thru, and we dont have a spicy three pepper sauce dispenser back there.. we had to run to the back, grab a cup and lid, run to the lobby, fill it up with the outsde dispenser, then bring it back to the customer atthe window.. i always told them we were out.. some people actually said "are you sure? go look again for me" hen i'd just close the window and start talking to other people

that reminds me of the old bitches at walmart. They dont have it upfront so i ask them to please go look in back and i always get a no right where i stand. I know they have them they are just to fucking lazy

[JASonic]

Originally Posted by RavensChild that reminds me of the old bitches at walmart. They dont have it upfront so i ask them to please go look in back and i always get a no right where i stand. I know they have them they are just to fucking lazy

Walmart is the worse for customer service. They suck big time. Beef n cheddar sounds really good now. Extra cheddar.

[WAR-PARTY]

See my sig!

[Alexander III]

When I was a kid working at a supermarket, I was a stocker and didn't have time to help people. Of course people would try to get me to do their all of their shopping for them so I would just say sorry we don't have that brand. Nope we are out should be getting some more tomorrow. Of course they would ask for me to go to the back for them so I would go outside and smoke a cigarette.

[Vinyl66]

i usually just tell them that the FAA is doing an inspection and they usually run away pretty quick

[KingChronic]

not to get them to go away, but when i used to work with my dad doing home remodeling, if we needed to do any electrical work, the day before we would tell them we need to shut the power down a day in advance to let it "drain down" and 90% of them bought it.

we laughed our asses off at night and the whole next day on the jobs.

[AtlanticBlue99]

i work at a restaurant that you order at the counter and fill your own drinks up... well when we run out of lids for cups and customers ask me for more lids, i simply say we are out.

it is bullshit b/c i am 6'1'' and i cant reach the height that they stock the damn lids in the back. and getting on a step ladder screams gay.

[tsp_2177]

Originally Posted by Vinyl66 i usually just tell them that the FAA is doing an inspection and they usually run away pretty quick

[LanceD]

I was a pizza slinger for a few years. Once I sneezed and sent a big 'ol ball 'o snot onto some mexican fiesta type pizza (I forget the name). To keep things on an even keel and to keep myself from making it again I convinced the customer that it was a green chili. Yummy...

[AtlanticBlue99]

Originally Posted by LanceD I was a pizza slinger for a few years. Once I sneezed and sent a big 'ol ball 'o snot onto some mexican fiesta type pizza (I forget the name). To keep things on an even keel and to keep myself from making it again I convinced the customer that it was a green chili. Yummy...

haha, gross man.

[LanceD]

Originally Posted by AtlanticBlue99 haha, gross man.

Yeah, as a general tip, don't ever go to Peter Piper Pizza. I was far from the worst at pulling shenanigans. Things that make you go

[GreenFaleen]

when I was at autozone guys would come in telling me about everything wrong with their car and want me to get everything to fix it, but they wanted me to order like a good 6000 worth or parts for their car they just picked up for 300 bucks, so I always would pretend to listen while looking up stuff for my car then just sale them a can of seafoam and marvel mystery oil and said it'll fix everything, apparently marvel fixes a stuck window regulator lol

[Dansby]

I work at a putt putt place...convinced someone we were out of balls, haha. Didn't feel like emptying the hopper.

[moond0ggie]

A lot of my customers try to act buddy-buddy to get a good deal from me,

As soon as they start hinting to me about a better price, I always assure them by saying,

"I cheat the other guys & pass the savings on to YOU"

[G.T. Rags]

when i used to work as a cashier i used to change the name on my name tag everyday.......

um...... every once in a while as a valet we would just get bored and instead of parking there cars we'd just charge them 10 bux to park themselves, n go home after 20 cars.........

this isn't really a custemer, but when i worked as a Graphic Designer they would have me answer all the phones cause i was bottom rung....... well my mom was the finance manager and basically told me anyone calling asking about money, asking about selling there service etc, to politely tell no. Well after 2 months of non stop vendors and companys calling i gots bored. This one woman called up trying to get us to switch over to there business phone/internet service. I told her i wasn't interested, that ares was for free. She asked me how, and I simply said that I hadn't paid the bill in 5 years, no one cut off the phone line, so why fuck with a good thing.

Hmmmmmmm......what else........

valet job again.....working at a night clun, these two brothers get into a fight.......beating the shit out of eachother in the parking lot. It gets broken up, they hug like a bunch of fags in heat, and someone yells the cops are coming, so they tare ass through our parking lot, stop short infront of one of the cars, gets out of there car, looks at them both, then gets in theres and takes off......

I go walking over there and see this red hyundai tiburon all crushed in. I'm like fuckkkk. We call the cops, file a police report, and actually have the guy arrested within the hour because a bystander got the lisence plate cause of the fight....

oh it gets better. 3 hours later the club is closing up, and the owner of the car comes out. Hott ass bitch. Like Zip would kill a kitten just to bow down before her. We tell her what happened, and not to worry, they caught the guy. When we bring her car around, she's like wears the damage? We point to the marks on her car, and she's like, nah, a car hit me in a parking lot 6 months ago and took off.

Me and my co worker just look at eachother, drop jaws, not knowing what to do. Woman walks up to us both, takes the report, kisses us both on the cheeck, and says were the greatest, cause now she can file a claim and get her car fixed, then hops in and takes off......

My company of course was sued, i was questioned, and I gave my statement as accuretly as possible. Lets just say my company no longer valets for that night club

[Squints]

"20 bucks for a ZJ." haahahahaha everyone knows the going rate for a ZJ is 15.

[SteviGX]

Originally Posted by GreenFaleen when I was at autozone guys would come in telling me about everything wrong with their car and want me to get everything to fix it, but they wanted me to order like a good 6000 worth or parts for their car they just picked up for 300 bucks, so I always would pretend to listen while looking up stuff for my car then just sale them a can of seafoam and marvel mystery oil and said it'll fix everything, apparently marvel fixes a stuck window regulator lol

I do the same exact thing! i tell em change the fuse it will work. engine light, change the fuse. people will believe anything you say, then you got the idiots who go i dont think that is what i need.

It's so fun! Hell i'm gonna do it tonight!