http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums Welcome to The Clubhouse! For all of your off topic talk and just general B.S. Got a joke or funny story? en Fri, 20 Nov 2009 21:03:11 GMT vBulletin 60 http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/images/mm/misc/rss.jpg http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144083-rags.html Fri, 20 Nov 2009 20:54:13 GMT Reps!!!!!!!!!!!

I pulled the envelope open and "stars" fuckin flew all over the truck while I was driving. They were getting sucked out the window.


I looked like "my little pony" driving down the street leaving a sparkly trail of stars in my wake.


I havent laughed that hard in awhile. Im not sure how the cars behind me felt though.LOL!!!!!!!! ]]> The Clubhouse JASonic http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144083-rags.html http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144080-tried-teach-my-girlfriend-how-drive-stick.html Fri, 20 Nov 2009 20:18:55 GMT So last night I tried to teach Kelly how to drive stick. We've been in multiple situations together where it would have been a lifesaver if she knew how. I bottomed out in some sand at the beach once. I was parked on the side of the road and bottomed out. All I need was some extra weight outside of the car and I could of gotten out but she would have had to drive it...

Well anyway, we went to a nice big rodeo... I mean parking lot, and we spent about 2 hours out there...

She still didn't get it. She would basically dump the clutch as soon as she felt the engagement point. I kept telling her to give it more gas. She would then basically launch it, but ride the clutch like no tomorrow...

I swear like, she has zero concept of it. I tried explaining it, but she's making it more difficult than it is.


By the way, this wasn't on my car THANK GOD. My buddy who has a Civic let me borrow his car for that pupose. He was with us. He doesn't like the car anyway so it all worked out I guess....


Is there any easier way to teach somone how to ride a stick, I mean drive... a stick. :shiftyeyes ]]> The Clubhouse zinc02GT http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144080-tried-teach-my-girlfriend-how-drive-stick.html http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144078-blackfriday.html Fri, 20 Nov 2009 19:51:04 GMT incase no one knows Black Friday Ads for Black Friday 2009 and Black Friday Deals! (http://www.blackfriday.info/) incase no one knows

Black Friday Ads for Black Friday 2009 and Black Friday Deals! ]]> The Clubhouse Tiller http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144078-blackfriday.html http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144076-full-exhaust-its-way.html Fri, 20 Nov 2009 19:27:01 GMT BBK ceramic LT's o/r h pipe, and slp LM. gunna be sick. they didnt have my rims in yet but hopefully in the next week or so i can get those ordered, then ill start work on getting my suspension done. and after that im going to be finding a low mileage 4.6 pi, and im going to rebuild it a little at a time till its where i want it, and drop it in, its going great ]]> The Clubhouse 96StangGT4 http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144076-full-exhaust-its-way.html http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144073-stone-chips-suck.html Fri, 20 Nov 2009 19:00:46 GMT So I got a stone chip a couple of weeks ago......took an appointment for next week to fix it before it becomes a crack....but wow what a way to blow 100$!!! I hate those stupid little rocks!!!!!!!:mad: So I got a stone chip a couple of weeks ago......took an appointment for next week to fix it before it becomes a crack....but wow what a way to blow 100$!!! I hate those stupid little rocks!!!!!!!:mad: ]]> The Clubhouse luvmyGT http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144073-stone-chips-suck.html http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144069-life-sux.html Fri, 20 Nov 2009 16:54:35 GMT There was a cucumber, a pickle, and a penis sitting around talking about how their lives sucked.

The cucumber says "Man, my life sucks. When I get big, fat, and juicy, they cut me up and stick me on a salad."

The pickle looks at him and says, "You think you have it bad? When I get big, fat, and juicy, they stick me in vinegar, put spices on me, and stick me in a jar."

The penis looks at him and says, "You think you have it rough? When I get big, fat, and juicy, they stick a plastic bag over my head, stick me in a dark room, and bang my head against the wall until I throw up all over myself and pass out!" ]]> The Clubhouse WAR-PARTY http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144069-life-sux.html http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144068-pooping-work.html Fri, 20 Nov 2009 16:49:13 GMT How to Poop at Work

We've all been there but don't like to admit it...
We've all kicked back in our cubicles and suddenly felt something brewing down below. As much as we try to convince ourselves otherwise, the *WORK POOP* is inevitable. For those who hate pooping at work, following is the Survival Guide for taking a dump at work.

*CROP DUSTING* When farting, you walk really fast around the office so the smell is not in your area and everyone else gets a whiff, but doesn't know where it came from. Be careful when you do this. Do not stop until the full fart has been expelled. Walk an extra 30 feet to make sure the smell has left your pants.

*FLY BY* The act of scouting out a bathroom before pooping.
Walk in and check for other poopers. If there are others in the bathroom, leave and come back again. Be careful not to become a *FREQUENT FLYER*. People may become suspicious if they catch you constantly going into the bathroom.

*ESCAPEE* A fart that slips out while taking a pee or forcing a poop in a stall. This is usually accompanied by a sudden wave of embarrassment. If you release an escapee, do not acknowledge it. Pretend it did not happen. If you are a man and are standing next to the farter in the urinal,
pretend you did not hear it. No one likes an escapee. It is uncomfortable for all involved. Making a joke or laughing makes both parties feel uneasy.

*JAILBREAK* When forcing a poop, several farts slip out at a machine gun pace. This is usually a side effect of diarrhea or a hangover. If this should happen, do not panic. Remain in the stall until everyone has left the bathroom to spare everyone the awkwardness of what just occurred.

*COURTESY FLUSH* The act of flushing the toilet the instant the poop hits the water. This reduces the amount of air time the poop has to stink up the bathroom. This can help you avoid being caught doing the *WALK OF SHAME*.

*WALK OF SHAME* Walking from the stall, to the sink, to the door after you have just stunk up the bath room.. This can be a very uncomfortable moment if someone walks in and busts you. As with farts, it is best to pretend that the smell does not exist. Can be avoided with the use of the *COURTESY FLUSH*.

*OUT OF THE CLOSET POOPER* A colleague who poops at work and is Doggone proud of it. You will often see an Out Of The Closet Pooper enter the bathroom with a newspaper or magazine under their arm. Always look around the office for the Out Of The Closet Pooper before entering the bathroom.(hehehe this is you!)

*SAFE HAVENS* A seldom used bathroom somewhere in the building where you can least expect visitors. Try floors that are predominantly of the opposite sex. This will reduce the odds of a pooper of your sex entering the bathroom.

*TURD BURGLAR* Someone who does not realize that you are in the stall and tries to force the door open. This is one of the most shocking and vulnerable moments that can occur when taking a poop at work. If this occurs, remain in the stall until the *Turd Burglar* leaves. This way you will avoid all uncomfortable eye contact.

*CAMO-COUGH* A phony cough that alerts all new entrants into the bathroom that you are in a stall. This can be used to cover-up a *WATERMELON*, or to alert potential *TURDBURGLAR*. Very effective when used in conjunction with a *SHIRLEY TEMPLE*.

*SHIRLEY TEMPLE* A subtle toe-tapping that is used to alert potential *TURD BURGLARS*that you are occupying a stall. This will remove all doubt that the stall is occupied. If you hear a *SHIRLEY TEMPLE*, leave the bathroom immediately so the pooper can poop in peace.

*WATERMELON* A poop that creates a loud splash when hitting the toilet water. This is also an arrassing incident. If you feel a Watermelon coming on, create a diversion. See *CAMO-COUGH*.

SOME VARIETIES OF POOP YOU SHOULD BE AWARE OF:

*The King Poop* = This kind is the kind of poop that killed Elvis. It doesn't come until you're all sweaty, trembling and purple from straining so hard.

* Bali Belly Poop* = You poop so much you lose 5 lbs.

*Cement Block* =You wish you'd gotten a spinal block before you poop.

*Cork Poop* = Even after the third flush, it's still floating in there. How do I get rid of it? This poop usually happens at someone else's house.

*The Bungee Poop* = The kind of poop that just hangs off your rear before it falls into the water.

*The Crippler* = The kind of poop where you have to sit on the toilet so long your legs go numb from the waist down.

*The Chitty Chitty Bang Bang* = The kind of poop that hits you when you're trapped in your car in a traffic jam.

*The Party Pooper* = The giant poop you take at a party. And when you flush the toilet, you watch in horror as the water starts to rise...

NOW EVERYONE TRY TO GO POOP IN PEACE

QUIT LAUGHING... POOPING IS A NATURAL PROCESS ]]> The Clubhouse WAR-PARTY http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144068-pooping-work.html http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144067-its-friday.html Fri, 20 Nov 2009 16:21:50 GMT where the fuck is everyone? where the fuck is everyone? ]]> The Clubhouse ~C~ http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144067-its-friday.html http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144063-new-moon-good.html Fri, 20 Nov 2009 16:07:16 GMT I went to the midnight showing at the drive in with my brother and my ex(we quit dating because he moved).

My brother was playing the game last night and ended up with a bunch of girls. Then my ex said it was alright as long at the "glittery dude" was out of it.

So I'm going to see it again this weekend. Then me and my ex had a long convo on the drive home. So with only three hours of sleep, I'm surprisingly happy. ]]> The Clubhouse RunbabyRun09 http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144063-new-moon-good.html http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144059-insurence-quoates.html Fri, 20 Nov 2009 15:55:56 GMT ok guys bare with me. I am getting some insurence quoates I am going buy a 2000 mustang altho i am looking for a 1999 to 2004 I keep getting asked if it has anti lock breaks. What models of mustangs come with this and what other features come with 99 to 02 mustangs since those are the only ones i can find in my price range. ok guys bare with me.

I am getting some insurence quoates I am going buy a 2000 mustang altho i am looking for a 1999 to 2004 I keep getting asked if it has anti lock breaks. What models of mustangs come with this and what other features come with 99 to 02 mustangs since those are the only ones i can find in my price range. ]]> The Clubhouse xNUM1KILLAx http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144059-insurence-quoates.html http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144057-d-e-n-n-i-s-system.html Fri, 20 Nov 2009 15:40:22 GMT
Demonstrate Your Value
Engage Physically
Nurturing Dependence
Neglect Emotionally
Inspire Hope...
Separate Entirely


Haha anyone watch its always sunnny in philadelphia? The episode last night was funny as hell lol... Dennis came up with a "sure" plan to pickup girls and he shares it with the rest of the group...

here are some other funny quotes....

1. “The D.E.N.N.I.S. System is a comprehensive approach to seduction that I have perfected over the years.”
Dennis explaining to the gang his plan on how to get women.

2. “You should see him feast…he’s like a mantis. It’s amazing!”
Mac talking about Frank’s ability to pick up women on the rebound.

3. “Well, look at us. I’m a plumber, you’re a fair worker. They go well together.”
Charlie talking to the waitress about how well-matched they are.

4. “Maybe I should stick to stalking. Maybe, that‘s MY system.”
Charlie complaining to the gang that the “D.E.N.N.I.S. System” isn’t working for him.

5. “We’re going to the fair.”
Dennis’ plan to re-Dennis the pharmacist. ]]> The Clubhouse 03stanggg http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144057-d-e-n-n-i-s-system.html http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144053-economy-opinions.html Fri, 20 Nov 2009 14:29:06 GMT Again started getting off topic with this so i made its own thread here is a post that contains the stuff that was a little off topic.


Originally Posted by atlacatl213 View Post
Marriott hotel and other lofts built in LA next to the Staples Center... usually hotels are supposed to pay a property tax and all other types of taxes in order to construct a hotel but yet unknown to many, the local gov enticed Marriott to build the hotel and other companies to build their housing here. They WAIVED their taxes and said...fuck it we will make money, and oh that tax, well we'll just add it on top of our good citizens of LA.

Thats right my fellow Angelinos... We are paying for their buildings to be built all while they keep making sick amounts money. Corruption is everywhere, so don't just point fingers at the illegals for cheating the system, also keep in mind for how the system is cheating you our of your hard earn money. I only gave an example at a city government level... Just imagine how Corporate/Federal Gov. America is doing... In fact don't imagine, just go do some research...

Don't give me that shit that I'm a commie or some socialist conspiracy theorist. I don't believe that system works either. We westerners tend to be greedy and independent, not really giving a flying fuck about our fellow human beings. Then people wonder about not getting help in a time of need when their car breaks down on the side of the road and some other kind gentleman gets helped. People like that are dying off because we are not being taught right these days... If we all just took time and started caring for one another a bit more... and not have the damn government needed to be our crutch every damn time we need help, then we could be all be a bit better off.


The reply
The thing about taxing the rich people and taking not the poor is that the jobs are provided by the rich. If these rich people you speak of who built the Marriott, who are most likely Arabic of some sort, could not afford to build the hotel because of extreme taxes, then several hundred possible jobs are destroyed.

This is how the union system is destroying Detroit(aside from the quality of the products they produce). When these rich people have to close down plants because they can't afford to pay the employees, then who is really losing out? Everyone. The entire economy is hurt by this. The workers then can't afford their necessities, which will hurt shop owners, who will also not be able to afford the goods they need, and so on? But where does this cycle stop? It stops when another rich person can afford to, or sticks his neck out to, create a new source of jobs, such as this Marriott you speak of.

In October this year, the unemployment rate was at 10.2 %. It should be around 4%. Millions of Americans cannot find jobs because rich people do not have enough money to create jobs. Rich people can't create jobs because the money isn't there. Remember the whole housing market collapse? The bubble popped because all the fraudulent claims and the foreclosure? You remember that. Well with all the people without jobs and unable to pay taxes, and with a war going on and the national debt at what? 12 trillion dollars? How are the rich going to be able to muster enough money inorder to get the economy going again?

It's a cycle people. The rich create companies that provide jobs for the poor, then the poor use the money they have earned to go out and buy the goods from the companies that the rich own, thus completing the circle and so life goes.

Taxes can't all be lumped on one group of people, otherwise that part of the circle will collapse, and then so will the other side. Relativity.

We need to lower the unemployment rate by giving the rich people incentives to create jobs for the poor and that way we will all benefit from the economic boost.




*'Rich' and 'poor' used as categorical terms. ]]> The Clubhouse xNUM1KILLAx http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144053-economy-opinions.html http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144051-becoming-legal-through-military.html Fri, 20 Nov 2009 14:22:55 GMT This was brought up on another thread that is getting off topic so i post this here so we can stay on topic there. Basicly the situation is: Should we alow people who are illegal aliens become citizens through joining the military? This was brought up on another thread that is getting off topic so i post this here so we can stay on topic there.

Basicly the situation is:

Should we alow people who are illegal aliens become citizens through joining the military? ]]> The Clubhouse xNUM1KILLAx http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144051-becoming-legal-through-military.html http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144050-i-really-thought-i-going-die-last-night.html Fri, 20 Nov 2009 14:09:02 GMT Kind of a long story...
So last night before bed I had a tension headache...hurt pretty bad in my shoulder and up my neck. So I go to get some Tylenol and my wife says "why dont you try these...they are for migraines". So I proceed to take three of these migraine tablet and TRY to go to bed.
Well the tension headache goes away but I am tossing and turning and cannot get to sleep. 11pm rolls around, 12am, 1am etc etc
Finally at 2am my heart starts feeling like someone is stepping on it and I am wide awake at this point. My heart beat feels really weird and it just feels like its in a vice.
About 2:30 after much deliberation that I think I am "on my way out" I remember I took these migraine pills I havent taken before...coincodence?? I think not
I go check what is in them and there is Caffeine in them...WTF!!!!!
First I am not a coffee drinker and I quite drinking soda 3 weeks ago so I can only guess that my body was not used to caffeine anymore and taking these 3 pills at once just "shocked" my system/heart.
So then I take 2 sleeping pills and sleep for roughly 5 hours and wake up and my heart still feels weird
FML

And just a side note...yesterday was exactly 10 years since my wife and I first met...maybe she had enough and knew was she was doing ]]> The Clubhouse 87FloridaGT http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144050-i-really-thought-i-going-die-last-night.html http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144049-any1-houston.html Fri, 20 Nov 2009 13:59:33 GMT Anybody From Houston Or Around Houston?? Anybody From Houston Or Around Houston?? ]]> The Clubhouse 20gt08 http://www.moddedmustangs.com/forums/clubhouse/144049-any1-houston.html