Ok where do I begin. Again, I apologize for the length of this post... I REALLY suck at condensing thoughts.
First of all, let me make a few things clear:
Yes, obesity is an enormous problem in society.
Yes, there are an enormous amount of people with huge senses of entitlement that take advantage of lots of things in society.
Yes, there are lots of obese people in society who are lazy.
I do not hate Corey or any of the posters in this thread who are in agreement with him.
Here's where your initial post, Corey, and many, MANY of the following posts disgust me. The vitriol, the judging, the hatred... that's what is disgusting. I can visualize the lot of you now walking around in society, looking at fat people with disdain, feeling that disgust. Don't even lie to me and say that doesn't happen. Know it, seen it. If that's not happening, then this thread and many of the posts in it don't exist. This thread is proof of it.
What can I tell you. I was raised by a mother who taught me not to judge people in this manner. I was raised by a mother who taught me to be able to impart opinions and thoughts and facts without labeling and judging people in such a vile, hurtful, and... pointless and purposeless manner. I don't call people I don't know names. I don't assume anyone is lazy based of ANY facet of how they look or act from that ONE TIME I saw them. I was raised to understand this as well:
You have ZERO idea what that overweight person you saw has been through in their life. You have ZERO idea how they were raised, what they were taught, what they've encountered medically perhaps. None. Zero, zilch.
So here's the thing. My mother has battled obesity most of her adult life. So I've seen the looks, I've heard these asinine hateful hurtful comments before. But, how would anyone know that my mother was raised by a lunatic religious zealot mother who was in and out of insane asylums and by an abusive alcoholic father. How would anyone know what my mother has overcome. That from a young age she was responsible for feeding, bathing, clothing, getting off to school, her 3 siblings. Her reward for playing parent? Sometimes her father would wake her up at 2 in the morning, throw all the food in the fridge on the floor, and then make her clean it up, making her eat some of the food as she went along. How old is your daughter, Corey? This happened to my mother when she was 9 years old. Imagine that for a second. At dinner time, her lunatic religious zealot mother (when she was home from the mental hospital) would then force her to clean off her plate, no matter how full she was.
Tip of the iceberg of what she went through... issues with food? Yeah you better believe it. And she's battled it her entire life.
So if you were out and about, and you saw my four foot eleven, chain smoking, hunched over mother, hunched over walking from her car into the mall, and then plop down in a chair breathing hard... and your assumption would be that this is just another fat, lazy burden on society... hahahaahaha. Oh man.. do generalizations ever make people look like enormous misinformed assholes.
None of you in here would last 2 seconds alone in a room with my mother. She would destroy each and every one of you. Not with her body or physical strength. With her brain. Because while my mother has battled one area of her life, she has succeeded in every other area. And first and foremost, she improved her brain, her thinking, her knowledge. You will never, EVER, meet a person that is stronger, more honest, and more caring, than my mother. I know every guy... most guys, anyway, the ones that didn't come from an abusive household as my mother did, say this sort of thing about their mothers... I guess you'll just have to take my word for it. Do you ever wonder, if you're someone who has ever read my longer posts here on anything serious, if you've ever read any of the help I offer to people, do you ever wonder where I've learned to think? Where any of that came from?
It's ALL my mother. A portion of it is of course my own age and experiences in life as a man and a husband and a father, but make no mistake: It's ALL my mother. Somehow, my mother turned to books, to trying to improve her brain, her beliefs, to being a strong moral good person. To a person who takes no shit from anyone, but is able to facilitate that without tearing others down. She wanted to break the chain of dysfunction should she ever have children of her own. Thank fuck for me... who knows what life could have been like for me... well I do know it. Her brother and sisters never broke that chain. I see what my cousins, my uncle's kids and their kids go through... their lives are a COMPLETE train wreck, save for 1 cousin, my cousin Chris, who has turned into a good man and a good father with a heart of gold... guess who he turned to years ago for moral guidance and inspiration? It wasn't his own parents.
The reason I am able to move through life being direct and honest without judging people in a pointless juvenile hurtful manner is because of her. Ironic, isn't it? That my mother, so judged and put down her entire life by her own parents.... and by many others as she moves through life... would teach me to be this way. That she is this way with EVERY person in her life that gets to know her for more than a second.
My mother is 66 years old. Each year, her health becomes a bit more fragile, although overall her constitution is amazing. How she keeps going is beyond me. So aside from what she has given me personally as a son and a man, what else has she done in her life? Well, she divorced my father when I was 7 years old, when he refused to quit drinking and was going down a dark path. She didn't want me being around what she had grown up around. 200 bucks a month. That's what she took from my father, until the day I turned 18. She refused to get more from him just because she could. He was a firefighter- she could have gotten much much more. But she didn't want to hurt him in that manner- she wanted him to get better, even though the marriage was over. And ultimately, through giving him some good books to read, and through talking, my father overcame the drinking and what he was becoming and turned into a genuine sincere and good man, and has always been a good father to me since. She HELPED him, even though they were divorced. Never, and I mean NEVER ONCE, did my mother disparage my father to me. Even when I would ask her what happened with the marriage, she refused to tell me in detail until she felt I was old enough that I could understand facts without applying bias or hatred.
Interesting thought there, huh? Consider and apply facts without applying bias or hate or judgment. Interesting indeed...
So she moved us from a smallish city of a couple hundred thousand to a city of then 2.5 million people, and began to work 2 and sometimes 3 jobs to support us. Never once complaining, never once being too tired to talk to me, never cold to me, never distant when tired... always making time for me despite the insane work schedule. And boy, the things she taught me... amazing. Continues to teach me to this day. She also enjoyed her personal life, though, visiting friends elsewhere in the city, or at a cottage for a weekend, enjoying and studying philosophy, holding or attending conferences and debates on philosophy and life... that she would often have me in attendance for. Not that she would make me participate, I would just be around, listening if I chose...
Later in life, as I got older and met my wife when I was very young, 18, she began to grow interested in accounting and doing people's income taxes. She attempted to start a business with her brother, but alas, her brother, like almost all of the family, was too far gone from the dysfunction of the family to be able to act like an adult and to be able to be in business with. So she started working for a franchisee who owned a few income tax preparation outlets. Today, she has purchased that franchise, and has owned it since 2007, and she employs around 12 people. The number goes up and down as tax season comes and goes.... quite often I call my mother's house at 8 or 9 pm or on a Sunday, and she's not at home.. I call the 3rd line at work, and lo and behold, here is my mother at work... because she puts in 14 hours a day, 6 days a week, sometimes 7 at tax season. She puts in hours that shame people a third her age and half her size.
But boy, if you saw my mother hobbling around Disney World, and you didn't have a clue as to who she is or what she's been through or what she's done and what she still does... I could only imagine what people say about her weight.
So now let me ask all of you this: I guess you've never seen a skinny lazy person? I guess we've never encountered a skinny person who takes advantage of society, or of a system? We've never encountered a skinny person with a shitty attitude or an enormous sense of entitlement?
Give me a break.
So that's my mother. That's one overweight person, and obviously one of the most important people in my life. But I've known many overweight people in my life that are great people, hard working people. They battle that one area in their lives. So what do YOU battle in your life? Aside from being judgmental about people and taking shitty pictures of people you don't know? Or are you perfect? Don't bother giving me some bullshit either about how you at least acknowledge your problems and are trying to do something about it. You do understand that food can become an addiction to people, and that for many people it's not easy to overcome their personal demon? But I guess if YOU can do it, and someone else can't, it must mean they're a weak lazy piece of shit that you find disgusting.
So I know others, and being that I'm a truck driver, lots of the overweight people I know are drivers. And boy, do they take a lot of ball busting and this kind of judgmental bullshit. Except most of the guys I know who waddle around struggling with food and health... they fucking work SEVENTY hours a week, EVERY week... fucked up sleep patterns... working WAY more hours than many skinny people... which ironically becomes a contributing factor to their health and to overcoming that battle. And they would give you the shirt off their back, most of the guys I have in mind.
However, just like my mother, if you saw one of these enormous dudes at Disney World sitting on a bench huffing and puffing with a chili dog in his hand, again, I could only imagine the thoughts in your head, when you don't even fucking know the man and what he's been through or what he does with his life.
So here's the difference between people who judge like this, and me:
When we see the 400 pound truck driver sidle up to the buffet for plate number three, you think "What a lazy disgusting slob with no self esteem." I think "I wonder if that dude will ever win his battle. I hope he does one day."
Self esteem... by the way. If you think that being overweight means you have no self esteem... hahahahaa. I only wish I could put some of you from this thread in a room with my mother so she could just utterly destroy your inane thought processes on this.
Really guys? Are we saying that in shape thin people have self esteem and fat people have none? Are you kidding me? Some of the biggest judgmental jerk-offs in life are also the most musclebound. Thinking that they have life by the horns and that they have it all together because their physical being is in sound shape. Do you fucking honestly think that your physical being is the only thing in life that grants you access to well being, happiness, and self esteem? If you truly believe that, so be it. To each their own, I suppose. Never met a guy in shape who has absolutely ZERO self esteem?
So. At the end here, you (by you, I mean either Corey who wrote the OP, or any of the other posters who have written judgmental vitriol in this thread) may be inclined to now tell me "Well my message is harsh but it's the truth so too bad."
... that's fine. In my real life, I just separate myself from people like that. I have zero time (in fact I went back and forth in my head about even bothering to write this reply, but my mother would always remind me that when you see judgment it never hurts to try and respond to it with facts and reality)... zero time for people who talk this way. I cannot stand to be around people who look at others with disdain and make this kind of commentary on them. Don't for a second try and tell me about your 'message'. The thread is titled what it's titled, and the dialogue is that fat people have no respect and that you find them disgusting. If you can't impart your 'message' without that kind of vitriol, it isn't upon ME to figure out if your message is valid or not. I stopped giving a shit about your 'message' the minute disparaging judgmental words started leaving your mouth. You think I'm going to dig through your twisted disgust to find some twisted truths you claim to be espousing?
If you're walking through Disney World, and you become vapor locked on fat people to the point that you're taking pictures of them and posting them on line while you call them names and speak of them in the manner that you did here, when you should be having fun with your family, you have issues, Corey. I see people struggling with weight out and about trying to enjoy their day with their family.
Are some of these people taking advantage of a system? Yes, I have no doubt in my mind. What can I tell you. If that upsets you to the point that you wrote what you did here in the way that you did... you have issues, brother.
What do I mean when I say that, Corey? "Issues." It doesn't mean I'm calling you a waste of skin, or an asshole, or a bad father, or a bad person. It means: When it comes to how you view people without even knowing them, and how you respond to that view you formulated in your mind, that there is an issue with that.
Yes, if you post this stuff on facebook, on a public forum, with that kind of speak... you have issues, and I absolutely understand why some of your friends responded in the manner they likely did. Because they're right. What is disgusting isn't the fat people, it's what you wrote here and how you wrote it. I would NEVER want my daughter to see me writing in the manner that you did here. Harsh words from me here? Perhaps. Here's the difference. I'm writing to you, in response to you, about a subject in a thread that you created. I didn't take some pictures of you and/or go start making disparaging comments about you elsewhere.
Nobody would never read this kind of vitriol from me anyway. I simply don't judge people in that manner. It's very high school-esque to me, Corey, the way you took those pictures and combined it with the name calling. I wrote it before in this thread, and I'll say it as part of my closing statement here: If you care so much about physical health and your fellow Americans, then find a way to be positive with that message through the continuation of what you do with your personal life. That's all you can really do. Set an example, a positive one, for you, your family, your friends.... beyond that, if you care more, I don't know? Start a health club? Do something for people who struggle with weight? See if you can convey a message that doesn't contain vitriol about people you don't even know? Don't give me bullshit about 'the truth hurts and I don't sugarcoat things'... that is laughable, my friend. If you cannot convey an honest direct message without being a dick, then you shouldn't be conveying the message. To what end are you conveying a message? Is it to try and help someone or something? Or is it to just talk shit? If the message is supposed to have a purpose, guess what: your 'real talk' doesn't accomplish shit. All it does is inflame and divide. Aside from the other misguided people who 'agree' with you about fat people who think they have life and self esteem and happiness all figured out.