Looking for Advice. - Forums at Modded Mustangs
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
post #1 of 9 Old June 17th, 2014, 01:49 AM Thread Starter
Sofa King Slow
 
LCBChef18's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Utah
Posts: 784
 
Garage
iTrader: 1 reviews
Looking for Advice.

I've typed this probably 3 or 4 times. I'm extremely hesitant to post this here but I like to think you guys are friends. I'm married to my job. The only friend I really have is in the Navy lol.

So here's the deal. My Mom filed for bankruptcy a few months back, and she called me today crying. No.. Need to rewind even farther. Late 2010 my non-biological grandfather paid for my Mom and I to move to Texas, so he could then pay for my college. After I finished college he came over to our apartment and told me he couldn't pay it off. There was a little bit left but he needed me to take over the payments. I obliged without reservation, of course. My mom and I hated Texas and wanted to move back to Utah. I was only making $9/hr at the time and couldn't really contribute much to the move. She payed for it all by herself. Right before the move my car broke down. She maxed her credit card(s) out to fix it. ~$1,600, even though I told her not to.

Fixed my car
Paid for U-Haul
Paid for Trailer to tow POS Saturn
Paid for gas in both the trailer and her jeep to get from Texas to Utah
Paid for Hotel rooms
Paid for Food

When we got to Utah she was fine financially. Got credit cards paid off. Got an apartment larger than the one in Texas for $300 less. I had already decided I was going to move up to SLC. She was going to stay in St.George. She hated this idea and felt that spending some dough to fill the place up with furniture from a rent to own place was a good idea. I advised not to, and that it was a bad idea. 2 weeks in and she's already piled herself up to her neck in debt but she doesn't even realize it.

I need to stop rambling. Long story short she fucked herself over. Filed for bankruptcy. Claims some obscure number on her W-4 just so she can make ends meet and owes the IRS (for last year) something to the tune of $2-4k. Owes $1.3k on a washer & dryer. $550 on an iPad she put on her contract. She's sold everything she has as it is to make payments. She doesn't have much at all, 3 cats I know what you're thinking though right? She did it to herself. This isn't exactly the first time she's done it to herself, just not to this extent. I'd hate to give her $1,300 to pay her shit off just to have her turn around and put herself back in debt.

She calls me today crying because she has to start claiming single and 0 on the W-4. For the month of September that leaves her $1.38 after her bills. That doesn't include a realistic figure for groceries.

She can't find a new job because anything she finds is going to pay less than what she makes now. Her bosses are assholes and take advantage of her. They know the situation she's in.

So I guess my question is what can I do to help her? I can't do very much. I feel like i've given her a false sense of hope today. Because let's be honest here, she's pretty much shit out of luck. She has nothing else to sell, and has already widdled her expenses down to what she can.

Current: Stockish 12' GT
Previous: Track Ready 10' V6
LCBChef18 is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
post #2 of 9 Old June 17th, 2014, 02:04 AM
I'm Ridin A Coyote!!!!!
 
mr.burton's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Arizona
Posts: 6,481
           
iTrader: 0 reviews
Well it can be worse, she can be dead like my mother. Tell her that, tell her to work her ass off seriously bro.

She has to help herself bro, period. You got a shit job? Paying less? Work longer and harder! Life can always be worse. I've personally helped my brother when he was in a bad spot, not much, but that $1500 I gave him got him straight and I let him know that I'm living check to check and I can't help him anymore. Now he's doing fine, he works like 3 jobs and is married. All is well, but yeah he works his ass off at shitty security jobs.

What I've learned is that people need to learn to help themselves. Struggle is a great experience, it makes you stronger as a person.

Good luck to you and yours.

mr.burton is offline  
post #3 of 9 Old June 17th, 2014, 02:09 AM Thread Starter
Sofa King Slow
 
LCBChef18's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Utah
Posts: 784
 
Garage
iTrader: 1 reviews
Ah, thanks man. I just don't want her to do something irrational. She is sober for god know's how long and when she did drink she had suicidal tendencies. Thanks for not trolling the thread as well.

Current: Stockish 12' GT
Previous: Track Ready 10' V6
LCBChef18 is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
post #4 of 9 Old June 17th, 2014, 02:32 AM
I'm Ridin A Coyote!!!!!
 
mr.burton's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Arizona
Posts: 6,481
           
iTrader: 0 reviews
Quote:
Originally Posted by LCBChef18 View Post
Ah, thanks man. I just don't want her to do something irrational. She is sober for god know's how long and when she did drink she had suicidal tendencies. Thanks for not trolling the thread as well.
No problem bro. I tell everyone the following...

You think your life is hard? Go to any ICU at ANY Hospital. Take a look around, end of story.

Let her know that only SHE can fix herself. Be firm also, don't fold and console her.

I'm a firm believer in "learning from the hard knocks in life".

mr.burton is offline  
post #5 of 9 Old June 17th, 2014, 04:36 AM
Chicken Fucker
 
Greywolf's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Las Vegas
Posts: 2,633
           
iTrader: 0 reviews
Sounds like she needs to take a long look in the mirror and sit down and figure where she went wrong. We all go through shit but she needs to budget within her means and button down and take care of her business. She's your mom though. Take her out for a nice lunch or dinner and tell her to figure it out. No time like the present to pull yourself up by the boot straps.

Quote:
Originally Posted by AR Stang View Post
moral of story drugs are a hell of a drug.
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheUNZippee! View Post
Peni are evil, conniving assholes. They do this to us all the damn time. Don't trust it!
Greywolf is offline  
post #6 of 9 Old June 17th, 2014, 01:40 PM
I Post Entirely Way Too Much
 
foxfive's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: MARS
Posts: 7,462
                   
iTrader: 0 reviews
Try to help her out with a proper budget. Everybody is feeling the financial pinch, sign of the times.
foxfive is offline  
post #7 of 9 Old June 17th, 2014, 02:30 PM Thread Starter
Sofa King Slow
 
LCBChef18's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Utah
Posts: 784
 
Garage
iTrader: 1 reviews
Quote:
Originally Posted by foxfive View Post
Try to help her out with a proper budget. Everybody is feeling the financial pinch, sign of the times.
What blows me away is that anytime she gets any "breathing room" she fills it up with "fluff" shortly after. I.e. she got something paid off so then she goes out and buys an iPad. Makes no sense -.-

Current: Stockish 12' GT
Previous: Track Ready 10' V6
LCBChef18 is offline  
post #8 of 9 Old June 17th, 2014, 02:40 PM
LORD ZERO VENOM SUPREMACY
 
zero001's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: salt lake city utah
Posts: 917
   
iTrader: 0 reviews
Help her out in little doses, and tell her that she needs to stop buying useless things. Don't just give a boatload of money and expect the right thing. Help her out with groceries, or grocery money so she could save her money to pay off things. Or give her some money to go towards debt payment. But remind her that your help is help not free money. She's your mom and knowing that you're around to help might change her, you never know.

Sent from AutoGuide.com Free App
zero001 is offline  
post #9 of 9 Old June 17th, 2014, 07:05 PM
It'll be bout tree fiddy
 
GT350pwns's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Louisville, KY
Posts: 3,429
         
iTrader: 0 reviews
She mainly needs to help herself. One HUGE thing that should could do is consolidate all that money into one payment. That has helped a couple of my buddies who have gotten in over their heads really sort it out instead of trying to keep up with so many different payments.

Best thing you could do is just offer her advice on how to budget.

Instagram @tykep91
GT350pwns is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now



In order to be able to post messages on the Forums at Modded Mustangs forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

User Name:
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.

Password:


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:
OR

Log-in










Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page



Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome