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Common sense isn't common
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Discussion Starter #41
Thanks again everyone for the advice. Going into this I knew what needed to happen but I guess part of me was hoping there'd be a couple people saying "if you love her and can trust her once your back people make it work after this sort of thing happens all the time" or something to that extent.

I'm going to try and update this every so often just to kind of track how things go once I'm back in college in a few days and find a new job and start meeting people. Mostly for myself to have something to read if it ever happens again and I need to know it'll all end up fine (or doesnt, we'll see!). And for anyone who ever ends up in a similar situation and stumbles across this.

To make things a little more interesting I'm going to upload a picture of myself and then the ex for reference. Then hopefully someday the new girl. If I keep up this diet and gym schedule I've been doing like I definitely want to now I'll show that progress as well.

Trying my best to stay optimistic and think this all happened for the better and nows my chance to really get in shape like ive wanted all summer and start fresh when I move into college in a few days. :drink and thanks again to everyone for reading all my **** and actually giving advice.
 

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Thanks again everyone for the advice. Going into this I knew what needed to happen but I guess part of me was hoping there'd be a couple people saying "if you love her and can trust her once your back people make it work after this sort of thing happens all the time" or something to that extent.
Hell no, never ever ever. Never. Ever. Anybody who takes back a cheater is a dumbass. Thats pretty unforgivable in my book. If you want to see other people and arent happy with your relationship then have the human decency and break up with the person youre with first. I dont care what the situation is theres no excuse for it and its one of those things that, to me, will never have a second chance given.

On a semi-related note that doesnt apply to this situation directly but is still a good life tip: If the girl/guy is willing to cheat on the person she is currently dating/engaged to/married to then thats a pretty strong indication they will do the same exact thing to you. Dont get involved with a cheater, it wont end well.

I hear people all the time "I never thought he/she would cheat on me...."
So I say "Well didnt they cheat on their ex with you?"
And when they reply with "yeah" I have to :facepalm:
 

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Common sense isn't common
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Discussion Starter #43
About a month after we first met. (I was 18, she was 16).


Her shopping for her 18th bday dress.


Me as of a few weeks ago. Yes I know I look young.


The faggot she cheated with
 

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Fashion Diva :D
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2,269 Posts
I agree with the douche comment and the socks and sandals. Such a shoobie. Also, the saying, 'once a cheater always a cheater' is never a lie. He/she had the tendencies at one point and when he/she went through with it doesn't mean they will think twice about the person they are currently with.
 

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To be frank, cheating in my eyes is immediate grounds to break the relationship for good, if you don't and if you get back with her...you will ALWAYS wonder where she is, who she's with, what she's doing and trust me....your brain will come up with the worst possible scenarios for when she doesn't respond to a text or etc.
 

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Common sense isn't common
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566 Posts
Discussion Starter #51
To be frank, cheating in my eyes is immediate grounds to break the relationship for good, if you don't and if you get back with her...you will ALWAYS wonder where she is, who she's with, what she's doing and trust me....your brain will come up with the worst possible scenarios for when she doesn't respond to a text or etc.
I know. I already did this with being so far away but she assured me she was just as miserable and had no life outside of working nd school. HA! but I did remember this morning that back in April (when she cheated) she ended everything but with no reasoning and I convinced her to take me back and we made it that far we could do another 5 months. She should have told me then but I'm blind I guess. Fml

Sent from my SPH-D710 using AutoGuide.Com Free App
 

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That 04Sixxer Guy
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1,427 Posts
This all sucks man. I feel for you. As hard as all this is, you can't let it beat you down. I was in a similar situation awhile back and after it happened I just dwelled on why it would've happened and how it was MY fault. This killed me, my pride and self-worth were absolutely gone after about a month because I didn't act. This put me in a huge depression-filled self-loathing pathetic rut that i'm just now starting to pull myself out of. First thing, someone cheating on you is not your fault in any way. It's their lack of worth, trust, and honesty. Second of all, any amount of sulking or looking back on the subject is not good or helpful in any way. Sure, you're gonna feel sad, but you CAN NOT let it ruin you.
 

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Toss her to the curb man. Once a woman cheats, she'll never stop.

My story...I was on the opposite side of this a few years back, I was working with this girl who when I first met her had a boyfriend. We were friendly, kinda flirted now and again, but I didn't press it. Then one day she tells me they broke up...now, I didn't hit it right then, but about a month later we get into it. Everything went great, no issues. Next time we have sex is in the back of my car and I see her texting while I'm going at it from behind...naturally, I'm like oh, you're that bored, let me stop...but her response is "no I'm not I swear, I just have to keep texting my boyfriend because he thinks I'm driving over to see him." They never broke up, she just wanted the dick. Needless to say I was ****in pissed because I've been cheated on before, and I know how this guy would feel (still finished though :shiftyeyes).

Moral of the story, my dick was in her while she was texting her boyfriend about the "traffic" on the way over and how much she couldn't wait to see him. You can never trust a woman who cheats...never. never. ever. never.
 

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Punching Throats
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1,246 Posts
Just remember OP, It is always easier to just start caring again and jump back into the relationship because it is what your emotionally used to, but the road less taken will be substantially better in your situation :)
 

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:shiftyeyes
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About a month after we first met. (I was 18, she was 16).


Her shopping for her 18th bday dress.


Me as of a few weeks ago. Yes I know I look young.


The faggot she cheated with
:facepalm: WTF, what a goofy looking bastard

please take no offense to this, but **** that ****. Once a cheater always a cheater, better to find out now, than a few years down the road
 

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Zoolander
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7,719 Posts
Last girl I had before I got into a relationship with my current girlfriend was a few years ago. She made me believe all of her lives "I'm not with him anymore." "I think you may be the one." "I love you." and all this other ****. I was 21. I thought things were great until I get this call "You might want to get tested..." She was cheating on me with her ex who she didn't really break things off with. After that she started saying things like we really aren't together, but her story changed over and over again. Then I see she is in a relationship with someone on FB who was supposed to be a good friend of mine. He drove me to the hospital where she was at because I was a mess. He is also apart of this site. Things were completely broken off after that. Fast forward a few months I see her again and I get this "I miss you." and ****, and I was keeping my distance and she would say things like "I miss this." talking about us being around each other, and I kissed her on the cheek, and she said "I really missed that." She told me they weren't really together, but they were. Lies, upon lies, upon lies. I wisened up real quick and said **** it.

Then...I lived a good life. A really good life that I don't completely remember. Full of partying, one night stands, and having the fun a 21-23 year old should have.

Met a girl, and now over a year later I still dunno how she roped me down, but I'm ok with it.

Moral of that ****fest of words up there? Enjoy life right now, **** will happen later, and it can wait.
 
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